I CAN TOO BE CUTE!

It has been brought to my attention that I am not able to be cute. That I am a perpetual hard ass SLUT that can't take the time to be cute. So I post pictures of my future puppy. I am in LOVE with this dog. Bull Mastiffs are the sweetest breed I have ever encountered and are so sensitive and loving. BUT they get about twice the size of a lab so for now I have pictures.

Number 11 - Worship at the Church of Patron

Damn it feels good to be a gangster!

Numero Once

what... i forgot to cast?

huh... I guess it has been long enough.

New cast will post this evening.

ThaSLUT

Animal crackers to make you feel better!

I loved these when I was a kid.

Am I the only one that could not tell them apart?

When I was little and stayed home sick my grandmother would

make me grilled cheese, tomato soup and 7-Up with a bendy straw.

I think that when you are sick you need TLC,

and that was what she gave me.

Soooo, I send my TLC out to anyone who needs it today,

in the form of animal crackers!

*mmmmmuah*

Janiekins

Silly boys! Tongue twisters are for girls!

Spa Weekend

Ok girls, I am off for a short spa weekend in the desert.

Have a lovely college football Saturday and NFL Sunday!


Stay kinky kiddies!
**Janie**

Happy Birthday Girls!

To my chicas a very happy birthday!


And to all of the hookers out there who obliged my incessant nagging and complied with the super secret Operation Birthday plans, I would like to send a big THANK YOU!


You are all TOPS in my book
Janie

Math for a Friday!

Steak and a game > Snakes on a plane

I... would never turn down FREE baseball tickets! I... love to hear the crack of the bat while sipping a frosty brew. I... like yelling at the umps when they make a bad call. I... like getting into and argument with the fan next to me over impact that the DH has made on the game and how the art of the bunt is a concept that has been totally lost. I... love going to games just for the idea that ANYTHING can happen, like the time I saw someone steal home.

I... will go by myself and have a fantastic steak at The Palm and then hit the game, I love having the stadium in the middle of downtown! Honestly, who turns down free tickets.

Happy Friday Hookers!

Soooo... I told her

Ok, so if that last post was a bit vague it was because I meant it to be. I have been planning a trip up to see my Mom and was thinking of dropping the big GAY bomb on her... and I did. The post was mainly me just giving myself the kick in the ass that I needed. Well I did it.

We spent the day at a baseball game. I had a blast as I always do when I see my Angels win! We decided to go to dinner sunburn and all. After a beer or 3, by me not her, I told her. She was great, she said that all she has ever wanted for both my sister and myself was that we were happy and it didn't matter to her how that came to be. She is honestly so ok with it all. I know that conversations will follow but all will be ok, in fact with that kind of reaction I would say that all will be great.

I am so happy to have a family that is so supportive and loving of each other no matter what. I hope that everyone can find this kind of support from their loved ones.

I love you all,
Janie

ok, ok, ok, I can do this!

Wish me luck!

Number 10 - DaDaDaDetails

(Shots x Beer)/Gay Bar = Details

Numero Diez

This just in...

Guy Smiley here reporting live from Sesame Street. A new resident has moved in, her name... Abby Caddaby. A vision in pink and purple with pom-pom hair reminiscent of Red Fraggle.

How will this affect the dynamic of our community? Bert and Ernie were unavailable for comment but seemed disinterested as they walked off, towel and rubber ducky in hand. Telly was worried as usual while the Two-Headed Monster argued over where she lived, each point in a different direction.

A feud has erupted between Grover and Elmo. Grover became insanely jealous as he over heard Elmo saying "Elmo loves Abby". The two have reportedly not spoken in days.

Rosita, Zoe and Phoebe were in agreement that they felt that Abby would be a great addition to their Sunday morning breakfast group. Zoe had this to say, "She seems like a fantastic girl with a very Carrie Bradshawesque fashion sense."

In an exclusive interview with Abby herself she stated that she in enjoying her new location as well as her new friends. Her only complaint was of a large feathered fellow who shall remain unnamed. "He just kept asking me questions, I found it rather annoying... Does he always do this?"

I feel that Oscar the Grouch best summed up the addition. "We need more chicks around here. Now SCRAM!"

This is Guy Smiley signing off

My two favorite things Miller Lite and Girls!

Helloooooo the post is down here!

Nothing like a vendor shmooze...

to get free baseball tix and booze.

Look for me in the VIP suite.

Are hotdogs really made of meat?

Have no fear Janie is here,

I will drink up all that beer.

"No more rhymes now, I mean it."

"anybody want a peanut?"

**This is why I leave the rhymes to Jodi!

Brought to you by the letter K and the number 11...

Happy August!

Knick knack paddy whack give the slut a...

Grab a glass of Kool Aid, Cosmo style muffin tops, get kafackled, jump like kris kross and don't forget to pet your koala! Ohhhhhhhhh Yeah!!!!!

I am keyboardedout have a keckcellent Kelkarific tuesday!
I am the key master who will be my gatekeeper?

p.s. does anyone have kabourophobia?

I have placed my old casts out on podOmatic.

Basket Case

This says all I need to say about season 3.

Point/Counterpoint #9

Geeks, Freaks and Cons...

Numero Nueve

Waiting on Janie... AGAIN!

Ok, Ok, Ok sooo there is a new SLUT cast on the way! But I wanted to leave you with a picture until then. The guy that was making the sandcastle was sooo fuckin intense and serious about what he was doing it was hysterical! I, being me, had to fuck with him a bit and pretend to nearly walk backwards into it while taking a picture of something on the other side. Let's just say that the dude flipped his nut! If I don't fuck with uptight assholes who will, I mean honestly!

Gold Star... Priceless!

So you never know when you are gonna see something that reminds you of the Kelkians out there. So this is for all of you Gold Stars in the Kelkaverse. Chaz and I were sitting on the ferry in Sydney's Circular Quay not really paying attention to anything, just taking in the spectacular views of the city. The ferry went to launch from the dock and I glanced at the boat next to us and a small bit of signage jumped out at me. I think I whacked Chaz in the arm and said holy shit! At probably the ONLY point on that day my camera was packed away because we had just gotten on the boat. I fumbled around and managed to snap a shot with the zoom lens just as we pulled away from the dock. I couldn't have missed that shot. I mean fuck... everyone has pictures of the opera house and the bridge but THIS was a priceless shot, well at least it was for me.

Stay cool this summer Kelkians!

YourBitch,
Janie

Thank you Chaz!

I am about to get on the 16hr train from Sydney to Brisbane but I wanted to take the time to thank Chazza and her brother for allowing me to stay with them for a week. I will never forget the time that I got to spend with them. Chazza's entire family and group of friends took me in and made me part of the group with no questions asked. I felt completely at home from day one and that made traveling so great. They are the greatest group of people that you could ever meet and I am glad that I had the time to get to know them.

To Chaz...

I had so much fun hanging with you. I was ecstatic when you decided to come to hang in Sydney with me, it made the trip sooo much more fun! You, your family and friends will always have a place to stay if you come to Cali so never hesitate to ask. Now you go rock up to the hotties like Missy Elliot!

Love ya,
Janie

Point/Counterpoint #8

There is a what? In the what? Next to the WHAT?
Numero Ocho

**Word of warning... We did this cast with a headset and to get both of us we had to hold it up. The whole thing has crappy mic fiddling sounds and I am sorry but there wasn't much I could do about it under the circumstances.

I love you all heaps and I know that we did not do shoutouts but we ran really long and we will catch you all on our next casts. I will also answer the questions that were sent that we missed.

Love Miguel and Whore-Hey